Comment by BaltimoreBaby on September 28, 2015 at 7:33pm
Sheila, how’re you doing? I hope this finds you in a better place. In case you haven’t yet found legal help, I poked around a little to see what I could find on free legal aid in Canada…
I hope my search is of some help to you.
Comment by Sheila W. on September 14, 2015 at 7:00pm
Thanks Laurie. You have a very big heart. I’m in a smaller city in Canada where there are not as many services offered as in the big cities. There is not much help unless you pay for it, but I’m doing ok. It’s not so bad that I need an assistant yet. I do need an advocate or agent to help with legal stuff and to speak for me in court, since I don’t think quickly on my feet since my concussions and lupus fog, but that costs money too. I need the help to get the money from Mom’s and brother’s accounts, but I need the money from Mom’s and brother’s accounts to get the help. Such is life. God will help me, always has.
Comment by BaltimoreBaby on September 14, 2015 at 6:43pm
Oh, Sheila, this is so much for you on your own. You likely may have already asked for help from a social services agency, but if you haven’t yet, it may prove beneficial in some way. Or reaching out to your church for help around the house with basics? If you can at least reduce the load of some of the basics, it may help make the legal things a little easier. Please continue reaching out here as well. My thoughts are with you. I will continue to check in on you also.
Comment by Sheila W. on September 14, 2015 at 2:07pm
Thanks Laurie for checking on me. Just getting over 2 weeks of bronchitis. I was glad I got it, it gave me reason to rest physically when every gov’t and legal agency calls and tells me I have to go in to show both death certificates or whatever document they want. Certainly crying more now than in the first 3 weeks when I was too busy to think about it, but still, missing them hurts less than watching them suffer the most intense pain and other symptoms I’ve ever had to be around. God is still helping and will continue. It was just 3 weeks after their deaths that I already to plan to take 2 landlords to court, so that’s a huge learning curve. I have 3-6 hours of paperwork and phone calls daily, that will last at least a year I’m told. A person can’t even die in peace or have a peace after next of kin dies. So many agencies are just giving me a bad time because they don’t know how to process a request when 2 people have died, so they panic and give me a telling off or a bad time or send me somewhere else, and every person I call to learn how to do this or that tells me something different, so I don’t know who to believe. I hope something doesn’t come back to bite me legally after I choose from the many different choices of advice. Maybe by the end of the year I will have learned so much that I can be an estate lawyer’s assistant or just help people in my situation on my own and save them $500 an hour in lawyer’s fees.
Comment by BaltimoreBaby on September 13, 2015 at 9:01pm
Sheila, how’re you doing? I was thinking of you and wanted to check-in.
Comment by ptpsr on September 2, 2015 at 3:05pm
You are in our prayers and we are hoping you feel God’s helping hand in your life, because He is there with you.
Comment by pontovirgula on September 1, 2015 at 5:45pm
I’m so sorry you’re going through this, nothing prepares you for the loss of a loved one.
That’s so true, there’s no time for mourning with all the burocratic and pratical stuff.
Keep strong, I’m sure your mother and brother are watching over you.
Comment by Steinfadt1 on September 1, 2015 at 4:11pm
I hope you’re hanging in there. All you can do in your situation is keep putting one foot in front of the other. Eventually it will all be resolved.
I know what it’s like to lose someone in 10 days. That was the time of my mother being admitted into the hospital until the night she died of lung cancer in hospice, 10 days. It’s hard to deal with such a quick death.
We’re all here for you should you need to talk.
Comment by Sheila W. on August 30, 2015 at 10:24am
THANK YOU everyone for your kind words. I just finished weeks of pushing much too hard to get my brother’s house cleaned out by the end of the month. Now I have a bad case or bronchitis, so that will MAKE me rest. I am dreading the next year of almost full time legal and gov’t paperwork. A person can’t even die in peace! I got a will made because I don’t want my sister to go through with me what I am going through with my brother’s estate who had no will. I am so grateful for good people like you who are willing to drop a note of encouragement. It has really meant a lot. My days centered around my mom and brother, so this is a HUGE adjustment. May you each be blessed 10x over for the comfort you’ve offered me.
Comment by Cathy In MD on August 30, 2015 at 8:55am
Sheila, I am so sorry for your loss. PLEASE take time to take care of yourself during this time when you need to the most. Remember, you are being presented with a new path, try to be patient and see where it takes you. However, if your doctor is concerned about your health, then you need to take care of yourself during this period more than ever.
Take time to grieve, to rest, to meditate, to pray, whatever works for you to help you restore. You are allowed and you need to.
And of course, we are all here for you during this difficult time.
Cathy In MD