Some parents (and others) just don't understand?

I’m new here so forgive me if I’m beating dead horses for you guys. There is a segment about being addicted to pain meds on TV today and of course my Mom is all over it. This new insurance I have won’t pay for my full prescription of Tramadol so I end up having to try to stretch and make do… Not a huge problem but when I run out then I kind of have to just deal with the pain until I can refill (This just happened so I’m still adjusting to going from 180 to 100). Then she tells my extended family that I’m a junkie. Needless to say I’m disgusted right now.

Wow sorry you have to deal with that kind of crap

Wow that’s terrible:/tramadol is technically controlled" but it’s not a real opioid. It’s kinda equivalent to a 800 mlg ibuprofen but with a more over all pain relieving properties… its completely unreasonable to call you or anyone on tramadol for "disease " pain, especially such a low dosage a junkie! Could you mother maybe go with you to the prescribing Dr’s appointment to maybe better understand this drug? I assume you’re not very close with her if she would say such horrible things … hope it gets better soon:)

She’s one of those people who thinks if you can’t “see” something then it doesn’t exist. So since she can’t see my pain or fatigue then I’m just faking it.

First if you need your full prescription just offer to pay cash. Tramadol 50mg is not expensive. Don’t forget to check with smaller neighborhood pharmacies for price quotes, they can surprise you. Or ask your pharmacist if you can pay cash for the #80 that aren’t covered so you can get the full amount. Some pharmacies will not allow it but some do. Also in certain states if you have Medicaid you can only get what your insurance covers.
If all that fails talk to your Drs office about it and ask them to get a “prior authorization” for your entire #180 tablets. They can fill out paperwork from your insurance to basically let them know that you do indeed need the medication. If your insurance is just caught up with the # of tablets, you could ask about the tramadol ER forms. That way you would get extended relief with fewer tablets. Your drs office needs to be aware you are not getting the pain relief you need. (Can you tell I work in healthcare?)Lol! Hope this helps! And I am so sorry your family does not understand.

Sorry to hear the struggle. I’ve been on tramadol for about 14 years. Never had a problem with it. Not considered a narcotic or addictive though some drs feel it is more addictive than previously thought. That is all beside the point though when you actually need the medication for pain. the body when in pain responds differently than an addicts would. Also, without insurance I get it at walmart for $20 approx for 180 pills. Maybe see what your local store charges. Family a lot of times just doesn’t get it. Whatever. They don’t have to get it. Maybe have them read some posts on this board if they r willing. Either way, you know what is required to keep you going day in and day out.

Thank you Eagle for the info those are options I will definitely look into for my next visit and yes I have Medicaid, but here in Georgia for the #180 pills its upwards of $100 which isn’t feasible for me, although I have never asked about split payments /prescription. I say I don’t care what they think and they (meaning majority of my family ) aren’t trying to understand what lupus is or what I go through. But I’m having flare ups more often lately and I’m honestly just beyond tired of hearing the abundance of ignorance that surround me. I say I don’t care but my feelings gets hurt all the same.

Elita, just try to call walmart and ask Medicaid and cash price. Tramadol used to be $4 for a month but they took it off their $4 plan and now it’s $20. You’d be surprised how a drug can be $150 at Walgreens or CVS and $20 somewhere else. I just checked my history at walmart to make sure and that’s the price. There may be other places cheaper also

Eilta,
I know exactly what you are feeling. I have been sick for 25 years, and still my family doesn’t care enough to take the time to educate themselves on my illnesses. Very sad, and very painful. I just moved home to take care of my parents as they age, BIG MISTAKE!!! Just go about your life and live for you, if you ever need a shoulder…I’m here. (■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■)Deb



Elita said:

Thank you Eagle for the info those are options I will definitely look into for my next visit and yes I have Medicaid, but here in Georgia for the #180 pills its upwards of $100 which isn’t feasible for me, although I have never asked about split payments /prescription. I say I don’t care what they think and they (meaning majority of my family ) aren’t trying to understand what lupus is or what I go through. But I’m having flare ups more often lately and I’m honestly just beyond tired of hearing the abundance of ignorance that surround me. I say I don’t care but my feelings gets hurt all the same.

Totally agree with Lupie. I know for a fact you can find tramadol cheaper than that. While it may not be on the $4 list at some places you can certainly find it much less. Try Costco if you have one. I don’t think you have to be a member to get a Rx but double check me on that. Another option is to get your dr to write two prescriptions; one for the #100 tablets and the other for #80 tablets. Your Dr office may know some pharmacies in your area that will work with you on the price. And again don’t forget to try some smaller independent pharmacies. While they do pay more to buy the medications because they don’t have the “buying power” that the chains do, tramadol again is not that expensive and in my experience they can more easily change the price for you than a chain pharmacy. Best of luck to you.

I. do not need pain meds but if you are becoming dependent, try other sources of management to integrate. Be careful, with pain meds

Hi Elita

First of all welcome I have been fighting lupus for 10 years now and mine hit me in my teen years, young adult. some things that I have learned in time is that this Lupus us crazy. I know she is your mom but you can't let it get to you .You personally have to find a way to manage it is hard on loved one but at the end of the day its on you. Personally my dad always criticized me that I was lazy and that I was not being responsible for myself. I always spoke to him was that fatigue comes with Lupus. He still always said that I had to find a way to give myself energy. Like a magic pill I told him that if I could I would m honestly after a while he got tired. You Have to find yourself as a person and NOT LET LUPUS DEFINE YOU and also parents never want to admit that their children are not sick. If you need pain meds you take them. So sorry I am in a rant now I will let you go and Best of Luck.

XOXOXOXOX

Hi Elita, I was diagnosed Fibromyalgia ago 20+ years ago and and with Lupus 2 years ago only I believe it started way back when. Having too deal with the and fatigue on a daily basis is difficult for someone to truly understand I’d they don’t have to fall with themselves. My pain had gotten so bad that even Lortab want helping. After trying many kind of meds, my doctor finally suggested oxycontin even though it was so addictive. At the time I was desperate and readyto try anything so I agreed. For several years it kept me where I could function again and of course my husband was concerned that my use of it would increase. I was always asked if I was taking the right dose. It wasn’t until he had a kidney stone that he really understood what pain was. I finally decided to get myself off of them as I didn’t like having to see my doctor and nurses every month and ask for me. It wasn’t easy but I did it several months ago and now can manage with one or two Lortab a day. My doctor told me that it was important to keep the pain levels down as it effects your whole body if you don’t. One suggestion I can offer is to have your family visit the lupus discussion boards and read what others are going through. They need to be fully educated on your condition. It helped my husband to be more sympathetic to my needs. God luck hon.



Unshoreandscared said:

I. do not need pain meds but if you are becoming dependent, try other sources of management to integrate. Be careful, with pain meds

unshoreandscared,

from your comment on pain medications it sounds like you have very little understanding of all of this and think like this poor women's mother/family thinks about Lupus and it's effects upon our bodies. Also most of us come into all of this with prior injuries and must deal with them and the package that is Lupus. The problem for Elita is not control but getting the medication she needs and is prescribed by her doc's and also the people around her not understanding what she is going through. Compassion is the word for today.

TY

It's something I think all of us go through at one time or another, you've got to learn to take it like water off a ducks back, It took me along time to realize that its their ignorance that makes them think the way they do about lupus. As for the pain meds, tramadol shouldn't be that expensive, I agree with unshoreandscared, if you are on pain meds long enough you have to keep increasing the dose to get the same effects, its called building up tolerance, til you can't go any higher, if its a prescription its called pain management, if you're buying them on the street its called addiction. I was on long term pain management with multiple opiods, eventually you do get addicted, its the nature of the beast. Just be aware this can and does happen to some of us. good luck to you, take care of yourself.

Welcome Elita, Great name by the way. So you will hear what you want to hear here and what you may not want to hear here. So my suggestion is, that you change what you don't want to hear to what makes you happy. For example, "My Mom would always say things like, "Don't forget your purse, don't loose your jacket" whenever I would leave my house (where I was raising two children on my own.) It would irritate me...after all I am a grown woman. (46 at the time) So one day when she commented...I changed it in my mind to...Dee , I love you. After about three times as I was leaving she said, Dee, I love you. I was shocked as she rarely told me. Wow this really works.

It is frustrating and difficult for parents to have their beloved children ill and sometimes they just don't know how to handle it.They get angry and may direct that anger at you. Same for other people...there is fear and lack of understanding. Having a chronic illness is a great teacher of compassion and it teaches us to have compassion for those who lack compassion. You have the power to change what you think...the mind does effect the body...one does not operate without the other.

So I hope you choose...that you are loved...even when it does not appear to be what"they" are showing at the time.

Imagine someone who gives the best hugs in the world...giving you a big Hug! Close your eyes and feel it.

Thank you for the replies you guys have given me a lot of avenues and ideas to research. I just refilled a script and my next doctor appointment is the end of this month so I think I’ll be able to put at least one of your great ideas in place to make my life and pain manageable. I do try to pay attattention to how much I take on a daily basis. I know pain will now and forever be a part of my life to some varying degrees so I try to figure out how much can I deal with. I don’t take a pill every time I feel a twinge, it’s when the pain slows me down and I still have things to do. But to my family I’m popping oxy and vicodin cause I stubbed my toe. Anyway thank you guys for the kind words, the GREAT AMAZING advice and for letting me rant.

Family members can be so critical and hurtful. At times, it takes the skin of an elephant to deal with the barbs. Sometimes people who are "stronger" in body than we are attack those who are less so....which is alpha animal behavior without using the brain. You have received some very good advice here on how to get your med at an affordable price. I hope you will get on the phone and get what you need and should have to be comfortable. All the best, Elita. Lupancatwoman

Family isn't worth the drama if your mom is saying those things about you - you should limit time talking to them or anyone who won't be a support for you. I've learned to stay away from/or reduce my contact with people who are "emotional pick-pockets", including family. I am on 50mg of Tramadol as well. It's a more mild drug than pain patches or other prescriptions I've been on in the past. Your doctor's office may be able to appeal why the insurance won't cover the prescription - I would fight that decision and have your doctor challenge the insurance company. Good luck to you! Find people who will support you - friends, family members who understand, support groups like here, etc.