Dish Soap Soup

I accidently used dirt to pepper the meatballs back in 1986; my daughter had filled an empty pepper tin with sand to stock her plastic kitchen set and brought it in while I was cooking. I didn't realize it was dirt until I bit into sand. But the crazy thing is everyone had started to eat before I got there and they loved the meatballs.

Since that day I am usually careful about what goes into the soup pot.

The other night I was already in mid-pour when I caught myself about to add soap to the soup. It was funny because I was able to stop.

I wish I could say that I am that careful about the images and sounds that slosh around in my cranium. And you know what? Since I have been involved with Lwl I can say that I am making better food-for-thought choices about what I watch and listen to. I  am also able to filter out more of the stuff people say,  people who don’t understand what I go through day in and day out. Their comments that may have knocked me down before lwl but I’m now more able to take their opinions in stride because I know I can talk to people who do get it at the end of the day.

So I  want to thank a certain someone whose brainchild now has many happy and healthy progeny; Life with Lupus is only one of 30 groups of people who make up this network of people helping people. Ben, you looked through the very special lens of suffering and saw a way to ease the pain of many others. Thank you. Inside a  compassionate heart, you worked through your pain.  God saw your tenderness and planted good seeds there.

LifewithLupus.org is truly wholesome and it nourishes us and does not weigh us down or leave us hungry for something better. 

Evenings are still so hard for me. But things are getting better because I can rely on my friends at lwl to be there when I have to fight a battle, people who will also be there when the light starts to shine again.

Getting to know people here has made me aware that the magnitude of an individual’s pain is far surpassed by their hope when given the chance to share reality: the truth, the whole truth of life with  chronic illness. It is not always easy to share in the same way with family or friends who do not live with the same in-your-face, ain’t-goin’-away today pain. But those of us who fight the same battle see through the pain; we don't deny it is there, we don't minimize the hurt, but we can see through it to another side where Life, deeply meaningful and worthy life shines.

Pain pins us down and won’t let us wiggle out of the mess we are in without making sure we have the gifts hidden there. Then truth sets us free in ways we don’t expect.

Thanks to Life with Lupus I am busy reading, connecting with people in a significant way instead of crouching in an invisible hiding spot in front of some violent TV show while I wait for the next day’s light to free me. .

I did a double take when I realized I was about to ruin dinner with dish soap; the sand in the pepper tin had taught me to stop and look at what I was putting into the soup.

Lwl is teaching me to stop, to read what other people who are suffering have to say, people striving to make their lives better by taking an honest look at what we have to deal with, people who do not want to waste a moment of life even if pain and suffering are part of it because we have all looked into each other's faces without turning away and caught a glimpse of something beautiful.

Thanks to you, Ben, Life is good even if Lupus is a factor.

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